How to transmit inexplicit knowledge without using real life examples
“It is just not the case that a crude description of a situation would apply to others in roughly the same situation. There are too many variables, not least of which is the uniqueness of every...
View ArticleMerely desisting from coercion is not enough
“Merely desisting from coercion would be unworkable. What is called for is the building of family institutions based on consent, and there is no recipe for creativity. Non-coercion is a necessary but...
View ArticlePunishing children using so-called natural consequences
“The natural consequence of breaking something is that you have a broken thing. What happens after that is something someone or other decides. Describing making the child pay as a ‘natural...
View ArticleWhy epistemology matters for parents
“Much of what passes for educational theory is philosophically illiterate. Epistemology has profound practical implications, which we should do well to consider.”– Sarah Fitz-Claridge Reposted...
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Relax about babies watching TV
“Don’t underestimate your baby. She or he will be way more interested in you and what you’re doing and what you’re saying than in that ol’ box, no matter how pretty the pictures are. Unless that’s...
View ArticleThe parental ideology of tidiness
“Parents are always saying, “It would just be easier to do it myself.” But then they don’t “do it themselves”—this is illogical on the face of it, no? They don’t do it themselves because they feel an...
View ArticleHow would you like it?
“I’m not saying anyone who does this is a horrible child abuser. But would anyone be willing to have someone treat them this way? I’m really shocked at this sort of treatment.”– Marti Gardner...
View ArticleAre your children free to follow their own interests?
“Assuming your children have interests different from yours, are they going to be able to follow those interests, or not?”– Kevin Schoedel From the archives: Posted on 6th March, 1996 “My...
View ArticleIt’s your house, your income, your everything; and if the kids don’t like it…
“I and others believe that coercing children is harmful to them. We also believe that not coercing children is a desirable and possible lifestyle which also is nice for the parents. Please tell me how...
View ArticleWhy giving children rules and boundaries is a mistake
“Children are not born already knowing the truth, so we should tell children our best theories, explain why we advocate certain forms of behaviour and not others, and try to persuade them through...
View ArticleIt is impossible to control for all the variables in any experiment involving...
“A controlled experiment is set up so that there will be no confounding variables—no variables other than the variable under consideration that could significantly affect the results. The problem is,...
View ArticleExpressing approval vs expressing appreciation
“Expressions of approval are inherently, necessarily, coercive and manipulative because …[t]he approval (in whatever form: rewards, stickers, love, attention, etc.) is designed to manipulate others...
View ArticleGenuinely protecting children versus coercing them
“You don’t seem to believe that it’s a child’s right to live his or her own life. I wanted to differentiate between so-called ‘protecting’ children from cliffs by roping them off far from the edge,...
View ArticleThe language of parental power plays
“Saying “rules are meant to be broken” as a means of claiming that this power is somehow benign is completely reprehensible if you are the one who gets to decide when and if a rule will be broken....
View ArticleGetting kids to ‘agree’ to TV limits
“Don’t elect yourself as being suitable to make decisions for other people’s lives, whoever they are, because you aren’t and you can’t. And you certainly shouldn’t try to make yourself feel...
View ArticleHow about explaining to your children?
“Believing that assuming that a higher form of intelligence sets in with puberty, and that experience causes superiority is wrong and is a very dangerous assumption.”– Nick From the archives:...
View ArticleExplanations and experience
“[Y]ou must have found out how and why bleach is dangerous at some point in your life, and I doubt you found out by the ‘experience’ of trying it, nor by being ordered not to touch it, at least, not...
View ArticleIs creativity a boon to the affected individual?
“Asking whether creativity is a good thing is the same as asking whether it is good that problems are solved. It is a bit like asking whether good is good.”– Sarah Fitz-Claridge From the...
View ArticleA big killer of creativity is having your creativity coercively diverted for...
“[To ask whether taking children seriously coerces children into being creative] would be like asking “does not murdering people coerce them into living?” You are not forcing them to be creative, you...
View ArticleCoercion of adults vs. coercion of children
“You are coerced because you don’t know much that is useful to anyone but have voluntarily taken on responsibilities that are more than you can handle. A child is coerced because they CAN’T avoid it!...
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